Look, I know I've trained. I also know I've not trained as much as I could have. But I've trained, OK.
I could even take not finishing because I didn't train enough. Collapsing from exhaustion half way up Revard. Why not. That's on me.
But what about the rest?
What if I leave my "convocation" on the plane. What if my cleats snap. What if I skid and break my collar bone on my Saturday bike test ride?
How's your pre-Etape panic doing? Mine's off the chart.
I've made a list. Then added more and more and more as new things that scare me crop up. I have three separate insurance policies. I'm convinced I've missed something. EHIC?
Do I need that as well as the three insurance cards? Is it in date? Do I have time for a new one if it's not? WHY DID I NOT THINK OF THIS SOONER!!!!
I mean, if my bike gets lost by British Airways I'll find a way to find another. I'll handle that. Definitely. But if my water bottle springs a leak? Can I get a new one on route. Will heat exhaustion claim me because of a leak?
After eight months of one thing being tattooed into my schedule it's frighteningly close. And there's just SO MUCH that could go wrong.
It'll probably be fine. Definitely, probably be fine. I'm fine. But, seriously, what have I forgotten? There's bound to be something. I just really hope it's not important enough to stop me. It won't be, right?
Look. Help me out here. What have I forgotten? Everything's already crossed and I'm touching everything that I can see made of wood. Does it need to be living wood? Is there a tree near here?
Oh. Dear. God. The weather!